Abuse, Abortion, and Silent Shame: How God Met Me in the Darkest Place

In 2009, at 27, I found the strength to leave an abusive relationship. We had two children, but my ex manipulated the legal system, and I lost custody. Heartbroken and desperate to fight for my children, I turned to stripping to afford the legal help I needed. During that time, I became pregnant again by another man I was dating. Overwhelmed by fear, I couldn’t imagine bringing another child into the world after losing my first two. After months of inner turmoil, I made the most painful decision of my life—I had an abortion. I had no idea the deep impact it would have: it strained future relationships, fueled addiction, and left me carrying silent shame, anger, guilt, and regret.

Years later, after regaining custody of my children, I finally began my journey of healing.  In 2025, I was introduced to She Found His Grace. At first, I thought I was already healed—but God had more for me. I was obliged to His calling. Despite wanting to quit, the women in the group stood with me. Slowly, I began to uncover the pain I had buried.

Through the Abortion Recovery class, God brought a deeper healing, peace, freedom, and joy. I’ve learned that healing isn’t a destination, it’s a journey. And where God's love is, healing is always flowing.

“She is far more precious than jewels.” Proverbs 31:10